Wedding With or Without Kids: Kids' Table, Childcare and Relaxed Parents

Children bring a lot of life to a wedding. For their parents, though, the day often turns into a permanent shift: anyone who is constantly checking on the child gets to neither eat nor dance. With a little planning, everyone can celebrate, parents included.

With or without kids?

That is your decision. A child-free wedding is perfectly fine, but it has to be communicated clearly. Say so kindly in the invitation, for example: "We are celebrating this evening with adults only and hope you will take a night off." Exceptions for babies who are still breastfed are common.

Why parents otherwise can't relax

Parents of small children do not get a free moment at a wedding. The child will not sit still, gets hungry before the food arrives and turns tired and fussy in the evening. Anyone who gets up after every course hears only half of the ceremony or the speeches and barely makes it to the dance floor. The parents notice, and often you do too.

Three things help most: a kids' table within sight, an earlier kids' menu and childcare in the evening. How to put that into practice is in the next sections.

The kids' table

From about four years old, children like to sit together at a table of their own. A paper tablecloth and a few crayons are often enough. Put the table within sight of the parents, but not right next to the dance floor or the door to the outside. Smaller children are better off staying with their parents, ideally with a high chair.

Eating earlier

Have the kids' meal served earlier, about an hour before the adults' dinner. Full children are calmer, and the parents can then eat in peace. Pasta or fries are not original, but they get eaten.

Childcare

From about six children, childcare for a few hours is worth it. That can be a professional childcare service or a babysitter the families know. A separate room with games and places to sleep helps a lot. Clarify beforehand who bears the cost, so there are no misunderstandings.

A plan for the parents

Parents only enjoy the celebration if they know their children are in good hands. Send them some information beforehand: Is there a quiet room? When is the kids' meal served? Is there childcare, and until when? Are strollers allowed in the hall? Then they can pack sleepwear, a change of clothes and the favorite stuffed animal accordingly.

Also ask when the families expect to leave. People who come with small children rarely stay until midnight. Plan a table near the exit for these families, so they can leave without a fuss. Schedule important moments such as speeches or the cake cutting so that they are still there.

When children have a job

Flower girls and ring bearers are usually between three and eight years old. Practice the route with them once the day before, ideally on site. Seat the parents in the first row so the children have a familiar face in front of them. And expect that not everything will work. A child who stops in the middle of the aisle creates more good cheer than any perfect choreography.

Children in the seating chart

Enter children in the guest list with their age. Then you know how many kids' menus and high chairs you need, and the venue can plan properly. More on seating is in the seating arrangement guide.

Frequently asked questions

Do children pay the full price at a wedding?

Usually not. Many caterers have children's prices, often tiered by age. Ask if it is not in the quote.

From what age do people count as adults?

For catering, usually from 12 to 14 years. Teenagers often prefer to sit with the adults rather than at the kids' table.